T e a a n d a S t o r y

2003-12-29T15:10:00.000-08:00

Weather: kinda cold says Dane, I wouldn't know...XD
Mood: Content
Music: "Points of Authority" Linkin Park

WoooooOOOOooooOOOoooOOOooOOoooOOoooOOoooOOOoooOOOOooooo.....new layout

out.

2003-12-27T19:51:00.000-08:00

Weather: nice out
Mood: Content
Music: "Numb" Linkin Park

~dances~ I just got back from a b-ball game, it was a lot of fun. Mary and Sue were there ^^() Not much to talk about. Christmas vaycay is slowly coming to a close, and I have to start studying...plus I have to go over to some one's house to practice for Oral Interp....X_X God, kill me now! I don't see why we're practicing...it really sucks...I got a new sweatshirt today, ^^ I like it a lot...but I need more....XDXD I'm slowly redoing my wardrobe...but emphassis on SLOWLY...@_@ I'm not sure what I'll do tonight...I'm seriously bored...maybe I'll call some one...naw

2003-12-26T11:55:00.000-08:00

Weather: not sure...@_@
Mood: Content
Music: "Numb" Linkin Park

'I've become so numb I can't feel you there'

Woo! I love this song! If there's a band that's made a huge impact on my life, it's Linkin Park. They really know how to express their emotions through their songs *and MV ^^* ~jams~ Final Fantasy Advent Children website is open on square-enix.co.jp but there's not a lot there, plus it's mostly in japanese *'cept for the navagation..which is weird for a square site* but I'm thinking of translating Sephiroth's section on babbelfish to see what it says. Othere than that...new trailer for it too...but I can't find the good version, only the crappy version....:p

Hum...........Sims rox, I'm gonna play that in a lil bit, but I just wanted to update today!

byebye

2003-12-25T17:36:00.000-08:00

Weather: Kind of cold, not too cold though
Mood: :P miss my friends, feel like crap...~smashes head on desk~
Music: none...craving Matrix soundtrack...and a cell phone...

Hi Hi Hi...wa'dup D? lmao, going insane...boredom. Christmas was fun, I didn't think I would get any good presents but I got some good ones...'cept a cell phone...~shoots flames of doom at her dad~ but otherwise I'm fine. They kind of over loaded it on the CDs, and that's pretty much all I got. I'm happy I got them, seriously, I'm just in a really bad mood...I'm always in a bad mood...~smashes her head on the head again~ there must be some kind of disease for severe irritabiliy and ringing in the ears....neh...

The flu went away right after we went to the doctor's and found out I had it...ironic neh? It was weird. But good. A good weird. @_@() I'm not able to come to the party w/ Mary and everyone because I'm celebrating with my family. I know you would like it if I could come, but it's a tradition. But, as a tip, I wouldn't plan parties on holidays like this...well...I AM the only one who celebrates New Years with family...so....never mind.

*thinks* I need to let off some serious steam..or cry...one of the two. I feel like I'm gonna blow up or something for some reason, and it's not because I'm sick or anything, I'm just sad for no reason....XD

2003-12-23T13:37:00.000-08:00

Weather: Cold...kind of...30 something degrees out I think...
Mood: :P
Music: "Like A Stone" Audioslave

Hewwo...new layout...I'd been wanting to make a blue one for winter, but I wasn't planning on making it until January. Oh well...

2003-12-21T16:14:00.000-08:00

Weather: Don't know..didn't go outside today
Mood: Crummy...sick as a dog...-_-()
Music: "Everybody's Fool" Evanescence..I made it faster and turned the key up so that she has a younger voice...like our age ^^

Hi...*coughcoughcoughcoughcough* What's up? Nothing really going on here. Gawd...sick...~_~ I don't have a fever or anything, just a cough and a headache, so I'm not THAT sick. Some one at Dane's house refuses to get off of the phone..so *cough* I have nothing to do.

^_^ I saw the final part of Lord of the Rings last night, bawled my eyes out at the sad ending, and my mind refuses to stop thinking about it since I left that beloved theatre...*daydreams*...anyway, you all must see it before I shoot your puppies mwuahahahahahaha*coughcoughcough* jk...nyuuuuu*cough*

Nothing else is really new, christmas vaycay...sick...LOTR....Frodo...*sniffles*....spoilers...~_~ alone...bored...phone line still busy........*cough* I'm thinking about restarting the format of a story I thought up a loooooooooooooooong time ago...like, seventh grade. But I'll make it a lot better of course ^^()....*cough*

2003-12-19T15:01:00.000-08:00

Weather: Probably cold...
Mood: lost...sad...alone...
Music: "Until it Sleeps" Metallica

I don't really know what to say. The person you know, the present me, is slowly falling apart...one piece...after the other. And I know you've all tried so hard to stick with me through all these heartbreaking times. Through the yelling, the backstabbing, the mistrust, the lies...and you always say "Friends always forgive friends." but I'm sick of being forgiven. I'm sick of...of falling asleep one night thinking "Everything will be ok tomorrow!" when...everything isn't alright...because I'm the reason everything isn't alright. I'm the one who's so stuck on herself, and so stuck on that world she's created in the back of her mind that, at some points, she can't even remember what the real world is like, and she can't stand it. Almost like a worthless creature who's lived in a cave all its life and is too afraid to approach the light.
I'm sick of hiding, always sick of it. I'm sick of making things up to cover what really happened. And I'm sick of dreaming of something better. If there really is a hell...well, I've seen it...I AM it. I don't want to be 'the girl that never really did much with her life, but she's dead now, so it doesn't matter.' and...well, I've tried too many times. This window of my soul has been scratched so many times, you can't even see through it.
I know about half of you are worried about myself being suicidal...but don't worry. I'm not even brave enough to do that, let alone live right. Almost as if I'm stuck between the border line of life and death, but death refuses to take me, and life is too far away to grasp. In a way, I'm just some mindless body walking around, waiting to fall off a cliff or get hit by a car. But...I suppose...that would be better than what I am now.
Maybe, all of you will forget about this, and you'll take it as another worthless call for attention from me. I wish you all would. I wish that you'd forget me, and move on to what ever else you're living with in your lives. If I could move to another country, I would. To start all over, that's some dream that will never become real. Even if I did recieve the golden opportunity to start over...I'd end up living the same life I'm living now.
Sometimes, I have great days, where nothing can mess up my life...but good things last only a millisecond to me...and soon after I'm ripped in half and left bleeding on the floor to recover...but I always do. I never give up, and I refuse to become completely broken. Like the stubborn animal that refuses to die.
I suppose, maybe it is all my fault. Of course it is. Because, hell is secretly what you've made for yourself. And if you've lived a good life, there's no hell that you've created...but if you've lived a horrible life...your hell is just as horrible as you can imagine. Right now, I'm just trying to live through it and hopefully survive.
What makes me discusted the most, though, is the fact that I'm just a small person living in a huge world, and I'll never be remembered thousands of years from now...and I'll never be thought of as 'the girl who lived as she wanted' I'll always just be...me...

2003-12-18T18:42:00.000-08:00

Weather: Colt....boring....dreary....blah
Mood: Stuck in a fake world....neh
Music: Michelle Branch song ^^

"It's not like I choose to live this way, Soul."
"Just shut up and listen for one fucking minute!" Soul slammed his fist into the cool marble structure he'd leaned against. "You're not alone in this fucking world, so stop acting like you are!" Rein shifted uncomfortably under his piercing gaze.
"I know I'm not...but...I just don't want to spill myself on the floor and watch as everyone sees my thoughts and feelings about everything...and sometimes it feels like I am that way..." Soul took a step towards her and she backed away.
"Rein, it isn't like that at all. We all have our own secrets, and I think sometimes it's best to keep it that way...after all..it'd be a pretty boring world if we all knew what the other has done." He forced a small smile, but Rein continued staring at the leather boots she'd purchased yesterday. Bad things always seemed to happen in new clothes.
"I know...but...I just wish that you would stop hanging out with Katie so much..."
"What are you talking about? She IS my girlfriend after all..." Soul gave her a questioning look, unsure of what to expect.
"B-because...I...I think...that...I think I like you." She'd told him. She'd said it. After months of heartbreaking visions of Soul and Katie making out, and sleeping together..she'd told him. Rein had the perfect image of herself, a gigantic puddle spread out on the cement, everyone around her looking at her thoughts and being discusted at them, the way they had managed to weave them into a web of her so-called 'soul'.
She looked up, and Soul stared at her. Funny, she'd expected happiness, mixed with a little bit of caring...but Soul's gaze was filled with hatered, and she felt so small against it. Finally, after a few more agonizing minutes, Soul stormed out of the park, leaving Rein alone in the pouring rain.

~~~

...*cries* Soul-chan ish being a baka...even though I'm writing him that way ^^. Nothing much going on tonight. I'm really depressed now, but I'm going to forget about it. I feel bad for not going to Minneapolis with Sue and Mary..but..I always screw things up when I go some where with ANYONE and I hate it...plus caro will probably end up going and God knows how insane that would make me. So..I'm..here? I don't know what to say. I'm not going to any Christmas party because I've already screwed that all up, and I might not go to Leigh's party because once again God knows what will happen there...*sighs*

2003-12-16T19:53:00.000-08:00

Weather: Cold...betcha saw that one coming?
Music: "Like a Stone" Audioslave
Mood: sad...

La la la..................aw crap...done writing...sowwies XDXDXD...um...here! present!

(insert extremely expensive and glorious gift here) thankyouverymuch

2003-12-15T14:35:00.000-08:00

Weather: It's Snaining! (snowing/raining) XDXD
Music: "Morning Glow" FFX-2 special soundtrack/Yuna's song
Mood: Everything pretty much...

Hey!
~Sephy walks in, hobbling back and forth with twenty pounds of toilett paper in his arms~
What the heck are you doing?
~he doesn't reply, and leaves the room~
Alright...we'll just forget we ever saw...what ever it was...~looks at the door Sephy went through~ anyway...today was boring. Mondays are always boring...~shoots herself~ dar...hmm...I have a little bit of homework, and nothing else....wait....I have a geometry quiz to study for...it's alright...I'm going with my dad to the mall in a little bit...bored....um...I'm not sure what to say. I'm mostly working on plans over christmas vaca...not telling you hy though ^_^

Lookie whatt I found ^_^

It takes a while to load the first time, so minimize and wait a little bit and then watch it so that it's fast...either that or you can save it and watch it then...it's really fast then..~shoots her slow server~.....*mutters* well, I'm really hungry, so maybe I'll write later...............
~sephiroth walks in the door and leaves through another one, snickering~
~cloud hobbles out of the room tied up with toilet paper, pink perminent marker all over his face~

I'm not going to ask...

2003-12-14T17:35:00.000-08:00

Weather: Cold....again....
Music: none
Mood: hApPy!

LMFAO!!!!!! ROTFFALMFAO!!!!! ~dies~ Isn't that the funniest picture YOU HAVE EVER SEEN...IN YOUR LIFE?!?!?!?!?!?!
S: I don't think it's all that funny...
L: LMAO! You haven't even seen the super sayajin ones of you, cloud, and zax!!!!!! ~dies again~
S: how is that possible..? my hair would be five feet tall.
L: EXACTLY!!!!! NYUKNYUKNYUKNYUK!!!!!
S: ...~stands there while being insulted~
L: NYUKNYUKNYUKNYUKNYUK!!!
S: ...~continues standing while being insulted~
L: MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!! BWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA----!!
S: ~smacks her on the head with a frying pan~
L: nyu....cloud only..............eats yellow................blueberries...........on sundays you....flabberwock...~passes out~
S: ~dusts off his hands and drags her to the couch, then sits down and sets her on his lap~
~Cloud walks in~
C: Great leaping chocobos!! what did you do to Lauren?!?
S: she was making fun of us...~points to the picture above~
C: Great tap dancing green beans....
S: why are you making weird statements like that?
C: I dunno...
L: ~drools on Seph's coat, a stream of puss flowing out of her nose~
S: eew! Gawd! ~squeals and grabs a towel to wipe it off~
C: you still act like a girl when it comes to your looks.....-_-()
S: shut up puppet...
C: eep! ~hides behind the couch~
~Zax walks in, headphones blaring~
C: Help me Zax! Sephy's gonna kill me!!!!
Z: WHAT?! I'M SORRY! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!! ~Zax yells directly into Cloud's ears~
C: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Z: WHAT?!
C: ~smashes Zax's CD player off~ I said...Seph's gonna kill me!
Z: oh! why?
C: I dunno.
Z: Cool...oh my leaping chocobos! What the fjck did you do to Lauren?
S: Why the hell do you two keep making weird statements?
(lauren: statements is a fun word to type...statement statement statement statement statement statement..^0^)
Z: I dunno...
C: ~hides behind Zax~
Z: hey! what d'you think you're doing?
C: hiding behind you....
Z: ~pulls Cloud out~ stop it!
S: ~grins malevolently over and Cloud~
C: ~whimpers~ he's g-gonna kill me!!!!...!! or worse!!!
~a little while later~
C: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! ~runs out of the other room in the dress Aeris made him wear~
S: ~walks out holding his side and laughing~
Z: ~stares at seph~ you have a sick sence of humor...
S: *laughs hysterically* do...not!
Z: ~raises his eyebrow and frowns~
C: ~is attacked by numerous perverts who think he's a she~ AHHHHH!!!! I'M A GUY!!!! I'M A GUY!!!
Z: you think we should help him?
S: no! let's watch! ~pulls out popcorn~
Z: ~munches some~good idea
L: ~is still on the couch~ pink chocobos are.....secretly....*gargles*....MAN EATING...*sputters* octopuses!!!!!

END....
C: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

2003-12-13T21:07:00.000-08:00

Weather: Cold.....neh....
Music: "Infanity World" Lain
Mood: Tired, weird...

~sephiroth looks up from his book impatiently and glares at Laure~
S: DUDE! TURN OFF THAT FJCKING MUSIC!
L: Why? *sniffles*
S: It's about people going insane!
L: ...so?
S: Ahem...needn't I remind you what happened last time you were obsessed with Lain?
L: um....no you don't need to ^^()
S: Well, no more Lain for you..
L: Fine...fine..I was just about to read a fan ficcie anyway
S: ~rolls his eyes~ you know, you've read that one three times?
L: ...~mutters~
S: There just aren't any good fanfictions out anymore are there? hm?
L: ...shut up...
S: Well, you COULD write some of your own...you have some fairly good ideas....
L: Right...
S: I'm serious!
L: ...
S: ...
~Cloud walks in whistling "Jingle Bells" sees Sephiroth, gives an immature squeak and tries to flee from the room~
S: Oh no you don't!
C: AH! Help!!!
L: nani?
S: HE SIGNED ME UP FOR THE "CHEEP LOVER'S CLUB" !!!!!!!!! YOU KNOW HOW EMBARRASSING IT WAS TO TURN THE mAIL MAN DOWN!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
C: I'm sorry! sorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorry!!
L: ...~snatches Cloud-kun and huggles him~ dun hurt my baby...
S: *sniffles* b-but I thought I was your baby!
L: ~grabs sephy and snuggles him~ you are my baby too U_U

awwwwww happy ending! ^^

2003-12-13T14:26:00.000-08:00

Weather: Pretty cold...
Music: "Everybody's Fool" Evanescence
Mood: Tired...U.U

Hellow, I hope you guys are enjoying my new layout, I really like the colors...and my display piccie is working now!! ^_^ I wuv it, it's so cool. Hm...what's new? Nothing really, I haven't really done much today, I would be over at Sue's right now, but I'm so tired...and I can barely type...*yawns* so...bored...*sighs* I'm not sure what to do...I pirated a couple of songs a little bit ago...~sings~ but I don't really care....bye

2003-12-11T19:17:00.000-08:00

Weather: C-cold.............U_U
Music: "InFaNiTy WoRlD" SEL
Mood: Content

Hi ya'll! ^_^ what's up? Nothing really going on here, I'm so bored...~shivers~ and cold. Don't ask me why my profile pictue over there isn't showing up...it's pissing me off a lot...NEW LAYOUT!!! ^___________^ I'm so proud of myself, it's sooo pretty. I like maroons and crap like that...

Nothing much else is going on, I updated my profile on MSN also, if you wanna take a gander... I think that's the link, if not just check it out the other way....umm....nothing much else...fixed Caro's link...other wise...nottin....fan ficcies calling...byeeeee!

2003-12-10T19:39:00.000-08:00

hey...um...just doing this so caro's button shows up...

2003-12-10T19:01:00.000-08:00

So tear me open,
but beware...
there's things inside with out a care...

So hold me...
until it sleeps....

it stains you, it holds you

2003-12-10T18:59:00.000-08:00

Weather: don't really care right now...
Mood: Empty
Music: "Navras" Don Davis vs. Juno Reactor

Hi, I'm really sad right now. *sighs* I don't really know where to start...but I guess, saying one thing can completely shatter your ecstasy in a nanosecond. I didn't even mean to do any harm...but I guess, knowing me, I can really screw things up easily...

Alright, I figured I'd help Leigh ya know? I'd tell her what Nick was saying about the dance, and she'd be like "Really? No way! That butt head!" or something melodramatic like that, but she blows up on me and calls me a liar and then leaves...I mean, I didn't mean to make her mad at anyone, I just figured she should know in case she gets hurt later...*sighs* can't I do anything right?

I'm still at a loss for friends...people don't even notice when I leave the room anymore...am I seriously THAT boring? I mean, some one can't be that boring...can they? And...I've been trying to find a friend...like through Krystal, or Katie, or Sue, or Andrea...but they're all in their own lives, with their own friends...so I'm just left alone...Lacey's leaving us...and I miss her a lot already...I don't know what to think...don't reply/mention this to me at all...i won't respond if you do.

2003-12-10T14:45:00.000-08:00

Weather: um...~glances outside~ sunny, no clouds, but chilly
Mood: Content
Music: "Nothing But You" Hemstock

Wassssssup?
~sephiroth walks in~
Oh go away!
S: What?
L: I dunno...Anyway, today was really boring I guess. I had this day dream about if my life were perfect.
S: Really?
L: Yup, it was cool.
S: cool
L: say...i wonder if that vfiction.net website is working...or maybe he closed it? I don't remember any notices about it, but I haven't checked Frank's web site in a while, speaking of, I wonder if Madam Hydra updated...
S: Or for once, don't obsess over fan fictions tonight...
L: Okies! ^^
S: ....
L: No, it still doesn't work, and Madam Hydra hasn't updated...pooie
S: Oh well, not like you could read them tonight anyway...
L: Yeah, I'm kinda in the mood for Lain anyway...
S: What? No way! ~ties her up and tapes her to a wall~
L: *sniffles*
S: Oh no you don't!
L: Fine...fine...so how was your day?
S: Boring...there's nothing to do here...
L: Where...are you...exactly?
S: Got me.
L: ...oookkk...Hey! I was thinking of going to MSN chats and looking for someone who really likes sephiroth and befriending them...afteral, I don't have very many friends to chat with at night...
S: you have meeee ~in a baby voice~
L: ...yeah...i think I WILL go look for some one...
S: *sniffles*
L: you're scaring me
S: so...
L: hmm...I'm gonna search E-Bay for Lain stuff again ~struggles to get off the wall~
S: ~helps her down~ well...alright, as long as you're not looking up how it relates to christianity or anything...
L: I won't! ^_^
S: ...
L: Ooh! Look at this wall scroll!!! I love it!
S: She's laying in bed and she looks stoned...
L: Hey! You're a meanie...OOH OOH! Lain PILLOWCASES!
S: Really? Maybe I should get one..
L: naw..the pic is small...oh! coolie!
S: What?
L: never mind
S: what ever...
L: OMFG......O.O
S: What?
L: ...*drool*
S: ~waves a hand in front of her face~
L: *points*
S: Woah! All five of those perfectly good posters for ten bucks? awesome!!!!
L: MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ~adds it to her favorites~
S: ...ok
L: Welp peoples, I don't really know what else ta say, so i'm gonna go now, bye bye!

2003-12-09T09:17:00.000-08:00

Weather? SNOW DAY! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~!
Mood? Happy ^_^
Music? "Come Clean" --Duff

~jams~ Hewwo peoples, by request, i posted all the pretty quizzes you see below! ^_^ I am bored! I haven't had the chance to surf the net yet, besides for quizzies, so I don't really have any news. I think I'll search up FF9 stuff today, for no reason of course XD

Dude, go to Fanfiction.net and search for "Ask Sephiroth" I think that's what it's called anyway ^^()....it's just people asking random questions and Sephy answers them ^^ lol, fun fun fun. I was lauging my arse off.

Oh! I have something funny from another fanfic you need to read!

With his innate knowledge of tracking, his single-mindedness, a good set of common sense, and a plastic compass he received by mailing in five boxtops and 25 gil, Sephiroth was coming closer and closer to tracking down the spiky blonde. Despite some rather irritating sidetracks, he was finally to the point where he thought he was getting somewhere. The trail ran cold just outside a certain door, which Sephiroth recognized from having spent about sixty percent of his adolescence there.

As the universe predicts, an event occurred that led to a great coincidence in timing, as Cloud had already experienced. The PHS rang.

"Seph?"

"Zack?"

"Look, I don't care what's going on at this point, I'm worried. I'm coming out to help you find Cloud."

"But---"

"Oh, and erh, Sephiroth, we kinda have a problem."

Sephiroth stared at the PHS and wondered if it was ethical to hang up. "What?"

"I don't think your collective gets out very much, because when I went back to check on them, they had just finished devouring all the food in the fridge, listening to the CD's and putting them back in the wrong order---"

"...what are you doing with my collective of clones in the first place?"

"---raiding the DVD collection---."

"Answer me, Zack."

"---trying on your clothing---"

"ZACK."

"Amongst other things," Zack finished. "And I haven't gotten to the worst yet."

Sephiroth felt a headache coming on. "That wasn't the bad news?"

"Nah, that wasn't the part that I thought would bug you. They've gotten wired to the point where they melted down the armor and sword collection you keep and ended up using the molten remnants to make a crude statue of you that they are now dancing around and chanting to."

"..."

"Tell me about it. I dunno why you keep them around; they're not even good artisans. You should see the way they botched your hair in the statue."

~reads it again and laughs her ass off~ Sorry if you don't get it/find it funny. Just imagine these two guys being dorks and you get to read a seventy thousand word fanfiction about it! ^^ ~runs into a wall~ I need to go buy a beanie...~whines~ speaking of, I need to add a "To do" list some day. Not today though, I edited enough already...XD Bored Bored Bored...I think that I will write some kind of story today. Something about hackers...^_^ not sure what yet. I've had this idea I've been day dreaming about, but it's all Lain/Romance crap...~sighs dreamily~ So I'll have to change a lot, but it won't even be Lainish when I'm done so dun worry! I'm also planning on updating my profile some time soon, not sure though, I don't wanna remove my piccy ^__________^ Gothic-ness=Good ~dances like a monkey~ I tried killing Sephy today on KH...but when I make Sora invincible, Sephy becomes invincible too...never buy AR...it sucks like hell....~smashes the web site "POST THE FFX-2 CODES YOU A$#@%$!!!!"~ *clears her throat* anyway, the siblings are outside playin', I'm on the puter (doi) and I should be doing chores, but I'll wait. SNOW DAYS ROCK DUDE! It feels like Saturday! Plus, we get to miss a day, so it's only a four-day week, now there are only three days left!!! ~spazzes because she's so happy~ Rant. Rant. Rant.

~Sephy enters, looks around, and sits down on the old, beaten up couch she uses when she and Dane are fighting~
S: You know that there's a card board sword back here?
L: Really? It's probably from when I made all those cosplayers (people who dress up as game/anime characters) attack Dane.
S: Why'd you do that?
L: Do what?
S: You put some words in paranthesis, telling me what cosplayers were, I know what they are. I have about three thousand of them ~says proudly~
L: -_-() So not true, I have yet to see a Sephy-sama cosplayer...and I was explaining it to whoever reads this blog.
S: People read your blog? But isn't that like reading your diary?
L: ~shruggles~ Kinda I guess, but I read theirs too...if only the would UPDATE! ~glares at Suu, Mary, and Dane~ I might relieve them of their links if they don't.....~says slyly~
S: Slyly? Is that a word? ~pulls out a dictionary~
L: Do I care?
S: ~shuts it~ Good point.
L: So, what're we gonna do?
S: I could kill you for putting those kitty ears on all of us last time...~slowly starts to pull out his masamune~
L: Oh YEAH! I REMEMBER THAT! ~pulls out a pair of white kitty ears for Sephy and a pair of black ones for herself~ ^0^
S: You are an idiot.
L: I know! Isn't it cool!
S: ....
L: Where's everyone else?
S: Welp, Zidane's getting his tail repaired because it got cut off in a fanfiction you recently read..
L: Shut up...it was stupid...
S: Kuja's putting on make-up and getting ready to go to a gay bar...
L: Liar! Liar Liar Liar!! ~smacks Sephy witha frying pan~
S: Fine. I have no idea where Kuja is ok? And Cloud is out running errands for me...
L: Lemme guess, he "wanted" to do them for you?
S: If you put it that way, yes.
L: You brain washed him again didn't you?

~at Hyvee, Cloud stumbles in, and limps to the counter where a clerk is just about to call for security~

Cloud: Need....to get....Cheeps! Cheeps!
Clerk: Um...sorry sir, we only sell those around Halloween, Easter, and Valentines day, we do around Christmas, but they haven't come in yet...
Cloud: Cheeps! Cheeps! ~stumbles~
Clerk: SECURITY!

~back at the couch~

L: You sent him to get your Cheeps again didn't you?
S: You know manly men don't buy Cheeps! But I NEED my Cheeps!! I miss those cute little Chocobo-shaped ones!
L: ...Seph...they're supposed to be Chicks...
S: Chicks? You mean, like hot women?
L: ...no, I mean baby chickens you idiot...
S: NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU THEY ARE CHOCOBOS! ~throws a fit~
L: Where's Zack?
S: I dunno, with Aerith?
L: Say Aeris you dumb ass! People don't know who Aerith is!
S: ~twiddles his fingers~ sorry...
L: Better.
.
..
...
....
.....
......
.......
........
.......
......
.....
....
...
..
.
S: So what do we do now?
L: I dunno...go outside?
S: There are approxitamly five feet of snow outsite!
L: One, you spelled that one word wrong...two, if there was five feet of snow outside, we'd be buried right now...
S: Hey, you're the one typing this.
L: Yeah, but I'm typing what you say...shut up..
S: ~grins~
L: Hey! I know, we can read some of Frank's fan fictions! ~rejoices~
S: ~smacks his face~ You know, it's not that funny after the third time...
L: Oh yes it is!

go here or die! ~hisses~ http://www.vfiction.net

L: ~shoots everything~ NUU! IT DOESN'T WORK!!!!
S: ~dodges the bullets~ what did I do?
L: Everything!!!!!!!!!! ~smacks him, and singes one of his kitty ears~
S: YOU BURNT MY KITTY EAR!!!!!!!!!!!!! ~whines~
L: Shut up!

~high-budget fight scene follows~

L: Alright, we're done ranting for today...
S: ~dusts himself off~ Shut up...
L: You shut up.
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!

~and on and on~

Join us again on "Ranting and Raving made fun by Seph and Lauren!"

S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!
S: You..
L: You!

err....

LMAO! I don't know what they hell that was, and if you don't think it's funny, I sowwies...^^ bye bye!

2003-12-09T08:42:00.000-08:00

You are Air...you are intellectual and adaptable.
You are good at rationalizing things and
dealing with ideas, but you can have a
difficult time with emotions.

What Element Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-09T08:32:00.000-08:00

Reeve

A quiz to discover which Final Fantasy 7 Shinra character you are.
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-09T08:21:00.000-08:00

The "Which Member of AVALANCHE are You?" quiz is brought to you by Gospel Decay

The "What type of clone would you be?" quiz is brought to you by Gospel Decay

The "Which Chocobo Theme are You" quiz is brought to you by Gospel Decay

2003-12-06T17:23:00.000-08:00

Weather: Cold, windy
Mood: ^____________________^
Music: "Misty Eyed" by Paine

^_____________________________________^ guess watt I found!!!! I was searching up things about Final Fantasy Advent Children and I found this on an inter view of Tetsuya Nomura (the character creater of all FF games)

DPM: Are there any chances for a FFVII sequel to be developed as a game after the release of Advent Children?

TN: I hope that this project may lead to something, since we woke up something that was sleeping.

^____________________^ YIPPEEEEEEEEE!! ~dances~ dude, if they start up a game of Final Fantasy VII, imagine all the fan ficcies that will come up!! Not to mention all the kick ass graphics, voices on the characters, most likely an awesome fighting system, on and on and on....~Passes out~ I can't wait! ~huggles Cloudie~ Maybe MadamHydra will finish COI!!!! ~passes out again~

Na Na Na....

Alrighty, just to inform the rest of you who don't know yet, I AM NOT GOING TO THE FORMAL, for personal reasons that I'm not going to say because it's really not important. I just want everyone to know that right now so that I don't get any more of the "*gasp* WHAT?!" things, so yeah...I'll add more later ~gonna buy a GameShark!~

2003-11-30T17:51:00.000-08:00

Your anime hair color is green.

What is your anime hair color?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-11-30T17:48:00.000-08:00

You represent... loneliness.
Always alone and always sad about it... unlike
angst, you don't have to look for a reason to
be miserable. You want to be in the company of
people but aren't sure how to act when you're
with them. Sometimes you have to make an
effort. You can't always wait for others to
come to you.

What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-11-30T14:22:00.000-08:00

Hey, this is a post so that the new things will show up...

2003-11-29T09:32:00.000-08:00

Weather: Cold, whispy clouds, snow on the ground
Music: "Navras" Juno Reactor vs. Don Davis
Mood: Hmm...well, I little bit between inspiration and hollow-minded ~_~

~
Dudes, sorry for not updating in a long time, I added some links as you can see, they're the sites I visit once in a while. Not all the pictures are exactly....safe though, so if your mommy catches you with one of the bad images, it's not my fault. Mainly there is like, one or two yaoi pictures and that's it. I don't know, maybe some nudity, but I'm used to it by now so I don't really notice anymore. ~artistic nudity of course~...um...Rondevouz is a really good art site, check out her new Cloud fan arts! ^_^ Ren (the owner of the site) has like, two yaoi pictures and on yuri or something like that, so it's really little. I don't think she has any nudity...um...United Flavors is awesome ~stares at the pretty piccies~ she has a really pretty piccy of Cloud in there too. What else? I'm sure you've all been to Black Cat by now, DDChan is a definite recommendation!!!! ~squeals~ her/his? art is sooooooooooooooooo cool! ^_____^ I'll add more linkage later, and maybe some quizzies. ~is on the hunts for quizzies~ "We wants it, we wants, the QUIZZIES!!!!" ~spazzes~ anyway...-_-()
I'm really bored right now, and it feels like Sunday. Mostly for the fact that I'm usually waking up at some one else's house right about now, and the fact that my family is showing up more that usual, which only happens on Sundays. I woke up this morning to the full surround sound effect of LOTR II, which I had to ignor while I tried to daydream...~shoots two hypello for no reason~ It's a good story I guess. I'm on the edge of a breakthrough, but I'm still trying to get some clear time. ~with no avail~

Music: "Cybernetic Eyecandy" --???

um...what else is on the agenda for today? Oh yesh, I need to clean my room and organize my drawing crap....~has at least eleven drawing pads with only four or five pages used~ *mentally smacks herself* I'm not sure what to do about my lack of drawing supplies...I have fifty bucks, but I was planning on saving it...maybe I can get some money off the parentals...~dances to the song~

"Yes, how do you do?
I'm fine how are you?
Yes please call my name"

That's all I can understand, there's a korean? accent in there. And I can't find the lyrics AT ALL....~dies~ oh well.

Music: "Your Horoscope for Today" --Weird Al...

Music: "Nothing But You" Paul Van Dtfk (nani-yo?)

This is one of the most kick ass dance remix/techno songs ever! ((besides Navras of course, nothing can beat Navras...)) ~dances~ It's to an AMV (anime music video) of FFX-2, speaking of which I've almost finished...~dies~ it sucks how short it is...I'm only at level 30 and I'm at the final boss....this is so stupid. I had to fight, Dark Shiva, all three of the MAGUS SISTERS....~pants~ and ANIMA! ~dies~ Gawd! A PERSON SHOULD NOT TAKE SO MUCH STRESS IN ONE DAY!!!!! ~dies~...~dies again~
~rabid pack of Shuyin fans, including herself, run in one the scene holding up their chibi dolls of him~ Aw....he's so cute! Too bad I have to fight him, oh well, I'll bet money he looks hot even when he gets she $h!t beaten out of him...

Music: "Until it Sleeps" Metallica

~drowns in angsty visions of Cloud, puts on her SCUBA gear and swims out~ lol, sorry, you should seriously listen to this song, it's, like, major inspiration for me. Most of my stories come when I listen to this song. ~that says a lot...-_-()~ I looked to see if any of my fanfictions are updated, but none are...not even the "Vincent's Last Birthday Brigade" one....nyu...it was soooo good too....O.o woah, that was a lot of o's....I think I'm going for the world's longest blog entry or something. I need to type a story...but watt? ~thinks~

"Sumtimes, I sits and I thinks...and sumtimes I just sits..."--Spink

!! I need to tell you dudes about my dream! It was soooooo scarey I don't even know why I had it! Alright, I know that my family and I were out on this old farm...and apparently we lived there. I think my friends were all there too...which either means that I feel close to them, or I think they're like my family...(uh...no comment on that one...you wouldn't understand) anyway, then we're in this jungle. And it's at this part in a game I've had a dream about before. I go to this temple and save, and I think "While, I'm here, why don't I head over to my school?" which happens to be in this mountain area not far from the jungle...-_-()..ok...anyway. Then, we're at this dance, and apparently no one was noticing me ((didn't see that one comin'!)) and Dane and I were talking...Mike Klein was...err...singing on one stage at the end of the gym, and everyone else was watching some popular people ((probably Alex, knowing me)) on the other end at another stage...((poor Klien)) so, anyway, Dane told me that Dan Arch and some other dude...maybe his brother, but I don't think so...got two girls pregnant....um................yeah...but for some reason I thought they were pregent (I didn't say anything, I didn't even really think it, I just kinda felt it) so I'm thinking that it means some like, they have to literally "bear the weight of their decisions..." or something like that...anyway...then I find out from someone..I think Dane...that Carolyn is pregnant.......O.o....o.O....it's most likely for the problems I've been having with her hanging out with....certain...unsafe....guys...*coughjeremecough* Then for some reason I WAS PREGNANT...........................................AHHHHHHHHHHH! anyway....um, I was really happy about it for some reason....now, this leads to symbolism...I hope...I think it means that you've made a mistake and you paid for it...which leads to the fact that....I'm not spilling my guts out on this, but let's just say I made a mistake and paid for it and was glad I did. Then...I woke up to the booming noises of LOTR II...~shoots two more hypello~

So, that's my dream...

Music: "Your Horoscope for Today"--Weird Al

AQUARIUS! "There's travel in your future when your tongue freezes to te back of a speeding bus, fill that void in your pathetic life by playing wac-a-mole seventeen hours a day!"

PICES! "Try to avoid any virgos or leos, with the ?apola? virus, you are the true lord of the dance, no matter what those idiots at work say."

SAGITARRIUS! "All your friends are laughing behind your back...Kill Them..."

Bored...there was one more thing I was going to add...i dunno...lemme see if I can leave with a short clip of some story in my head....~thinks~....~thinks summore~ Okies, I totally forgot about this one!!! ~prances around~ it's about 2 pages long...so be prepared for a lot of mindless babbling of demons ~mwuahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!~
~~

Demons In My School

Rianne Louise McCarthy pranced down the hallways of O + Gorman Senior High School. Today was her first day as a junior, and she was finally going to fit in, she was going to become popular, she'd read about every fashion magazine possible over the summer, and she could tell that she looked sexy from the way the other guys were looking at her.
She was sexy indeed, with her long black hair and red eye shadow, she looked like a demon, a demon, how ironic since she went to a catholic school. Her red halter top and worn black cargo pants made her look like some one with authority. Maybe a little gothic, but to her, gothic was good.
Rounding the corner, she arrived at her first period class, band. Although, she loathed band, it was a great social time and a great time to find out the latest hotties, rumors, and events in school.
When she entered the room, she spotted four of her best friends. They sat in a corner hunched over chairs and leaning against the wall. "Hey guys." She greeted them with a little pep.

"Hey Rein, you have to listen to what Kyle did last weekend!" The oldest, but shortest and most energetic of the foursome, Regina, or Reggie, called out to her. Rianne, also Rein, plopped her back pack on a chair and slouched in another one.
Reggie was short for her age, and of Indian decent. She'd been adopted when she was young, so she had traces of a British accent when she spoke. She too had black hair, only hers had caramel highlights, making it look so much better. Her make up was dark eye liner that was really thick, and deep red lipstick which seemed to bring out her features just right. Reggie was wearing a black tank top and baggy purple pants which made her look really cute.

"Yeah, it's so cool. I had no idea we could do something like that!" The second youngest, only to Rein herself, called out. Allianna, or Allia for short giggled excitedly. "I have to try this on some one tonight!"
Allia was tall with light skin that really brought out her eyes. Unlike the other two girls, she had strawberry blonde hair with dark blonde high lights, bringing the curvature of her face out nicely. Her eyes were a light brown, unlike the other two girl's almost black ones. Allia wore a light blue shirt with black jeans that had spider belts linking the back of her legs.

"Alright, out with it then Kyle." Rein said to the third person, the second oldest guy. He had dark shaggy hair and deep blue eyes that were almost abnormalâ€¦wellâ€¦they were abnormal. Kyle wore a green tight tee with the Grouch from Sesame Street, and baggy black cargo pants. He looked up at her and grinned.

"Well, you know how I do my ravings on Saturday nights, right?" She nodded. "I was out when I noticed this group of jocks trashing up some lady's house and I got real pissed 'cause I knew the person. So I got all fumed and then these jocks I was creeping up on suddenly turned and as if they read my thoughts, walked off."

"Dude, we already know how to force our thoughts into other's minds. What's so special about that?" Kyle held up a hand.

"So, I followed them because I wanted to make sure they wouldn't continue their little fun and games. But instead, they melted into the shadows of an alley, just like we can. I'm pretty sure they went off to Hell too." Rein stared at him in disbelief.

"You managed to convert a mortal?" He nodded.

"It's true, I was there." A third, deeper voice spoke up. She looked up to see Logan standing over her. He was a tall, muscular guy with deep brown eyes and black hair. Although usually shy, he was very strong. Logan wore his usual jeans and a white tee to show off his chest. "They had this look in their eyes too..."

Looking around to make sure no one was looking, Rein stretched her arms out, and the black velvety demon's wings perched on her back. Although, no mortal could ever see them, she wanted to make sure they didn't notice the change in the direction of the wind. Shutting her eyes, she forced her way through the minds of every one in the room. "Looks like there's a party tomorrow night. Jocks, cheerleaders, and other snobs only." She grinned with malice.

"Sounds like fun." Allia grinned, the others agreed.

"Shall we crash?"

"Oh yes, we shall..."

2003-11-25T16:09:00.000-08:00

MSN Member Directory - Public Profile

Weather: Cold ~nose-icles form~
Music: "Disease" Matchboxtwenty
Mood: Too many things happened today, so I'm a big mix of everything...

~

Hi! What's up? I know, I know, I'm supposed to make a layout, but I haven't gotten around to making one yet. But it should be pretty neat once I get it assembled. I'm thinking along the lines of War of Genesis 3, part 2, or Magna Carta. Because you know how prettyful that artwork is. Or maybe one of the pictures from my Anime Artists book. There's a really pretty one I can think of right now that would work perfectly.

Welp, I go down stairs and get ready to do my homework when....duh duh DUH! I left my binder in the car....~_~ ~is so stupid~ So I have to wait for my parents to get home. But it's not much to do anyway so I'm not worried. ~whistles~ I get to see STOMP tommorrow. It'll be so much fun. then monday night I get to see Lori Line @_@ too many famous people! ~is an ignorant SF person~

Hmmm....I drew a really good piccy today (look at my profile, the link is above) and I wanted to draw something like that so I sat down and did. If you look at the different parts of it, you can see my emotions and problems...but I doubt I could even find them. I don't really focus on anything while I'm drawing so I usually forget the secrets in it. ^_^()

Um...alright, time for the rant. I had a VERY bad day today.

1) ...I found out why Alex H. stopped being friends with me, it's because I didn't go out to shoot fireworks off with him that one summer. I seriously don't remember exactly why I didn't, I think it was because of the guys he was hanging out with. Some retarded (literally) guy and his friend andmy brother. I remember they started lighting the parachute things from that one kind of firework on fire and then lighting the grass on fire with it. So I told my dad. Maybe that's why. Well, I think it's really weird because of all the other answers I thought of...weird...well, I still wish I were friends with him, but I'm not thinking about it much. It doesn't really matter anymore.

2) ...................uh.................I'll post more later I'm really not in the mood for writing, more for the opposite, READING! ^_^ talk to ya'll later!

2003-11-23T19:16:00.000-08:00

Weather: Snow!!!! ^_^
Mood: You already know...
Music: "Cold" Matchbox 20

~smacks herself~ BAD REN! NO UPDATE FOR LONG TIME! BAD! ~whimpers~ Hi ya'll! ^_^ what's up? I suppose millions of people are flocking to my blog to find out what's wrong with me, and I WILL NOT POST THE ANSWER HERE. So you might as well close out because I'm just going to rant on about FFX-2 and this new day dream ~dreamy sigh~

^________________^ ~is on chapter 4 of FFX-2~ I seriously need rehab for this game, BUT ITH SO FUN! So, I think I'll ban myself for a weeeee bit until I miss it a lot and then I can go back and train for hours on end ~sighs~ but anyway, GET IT YOU SLEEZING MORONS! IT IS GOLD! ^_________^

I don't wanna talk about my day dream really, because when I do it gets old, I'll just say one thing.....seph=hott vinnie=hott zack=kawaii! ^__________^

out.

2003-11-09T19:55:00.000-08:00

Weather: Cold, but not as cold as it usually is...
Mood: Tired, doesn't wanna go to school tomorrow
Music: "Navras" Juno Reactor vs. Don Davis ^_^

La. Bored. Gah, no one was online last night, so I resorted to reading Cloud's Secret, which I've read three times already. Oh well, it was good I guess...~sits down and waits for Dane to get back~ I edited the web page as you can see. I'm going to change some more things later, but for now I'll leave it like this. I'm really bored...~zones out~..................~zones in~

I made a huge decision, I'm not going to the winter formal *le gasp!* if I don't get a date. I mean, what's the point then? Show up dateless and sit there the entire time without anything to do? Oh Gawd don't tell me that. Plus, there are some other things that cannot be mentioned because some people wouldn't like it. But otherwise, I'm probably not going seeing my chances of getting a date with a reasonable guy. ~shoots herself~ I wish I finally looked like what I wanna look like, but I seriously doubt it will ever happen.

Bored. I seriously need new clothes already X_X I think AE has some neat sweaters, not sure yet. I don't think I've ever seen their winter selection. I'm sure it's kick ass. Same with Abercrombie.

out.

2003-11-09T12:59:00.000-08:00

Hey, I'm editing the blog, I'll write later, this is just so you can see the new layout, hang onies...

2003-11-07T22:03:00.000-08:00

Weather: Um..cold :S
Mood: Tired, tummy hurts ~_~
Music: "Why Don't You and I" Santana and...?

~sits down and sighs~ I'm really tired, it's only twleve, it so does not feel like it...~sighs again~ what's new? I hope I get to sleep here at Mary's, it's kinda weird here, and I don't really know what to do. I wanna sleep in the other room with Katie and Andrea, but they're getting up at six, so I'll either wake up all alone, or I'll wake up then and be all alone. ~_~ I'm sick, ~barfs~ welp, I'm gonna o change into my pjs right now, so I'll write again tommorrow. Byeeeeeee~

2003-11-06T09:30:00.000-08:00

Weather: Everything's icey! ^__________^ ~crunches out in the ice~
Mood: HaPpY dO dA dAy!
Music: Some really cool techno music! ^^

~does a jig~ I'm literally jamming while typing. This song is so catchy. I downloaded a FFX-2 video and it goes to this. They should make this into a DDR song ^^. ~makes up her own steps to it~ Hm....not much has really gone on since the last time I wrote. Like the poem in the last entry? I like it too ^^ I should consider asking Mrs. Fester is I could do my own poetry next year. I don't think that you can...it sucks... XD Anyway.... ^_^ I love fan ficcies ^^ but I can't find any good ones anymore. I know they're out there. And I know that when FF VII AC comes out (JULY!!) there will be a shittake load of them. But I'm impatient so there!!! ^_^

Dane, my dad, and I went to go see Matrix: Revolutions. It was the best movie I've ever seen, I've never gotten into a movie that much.

2003-10-25T19:13:00.000-07:00

Weather: Friggin cold...
Mood: Pissy
Music: 1000 Words--Piano version

Broken

Don't touch me, don't even think of me
I'm fragile, soft, yet cold
So hurt by this world
So barred from joy

I let you touch me,
Cuss at me,
Punch me,
Throw me away,
And I never say a word
Never, never
will I rise against you,
hold up a hand while you beat me
mercilessly.
I'll just lie there and pray that this
so called 'life' isn't real.
That maybe I, too, can be happy.
That my sky will some day be a clear blue.

But you do not show pity, and my prayers
are not answered. So you break me.
I watch as my hopes, my dreams, even my thoughts
are all raped of their glory and laughter.
All I see is darkness and what once remained
of a young woman on her way.

I hope you're happy with what you've done to me.
I hope you smile when you come home and see
the small shadow of a woman in the corner,
broken, broken from head to toe
not a single piece of me left untainted.

For I am weak, I am broken.
I hope you're happy now.

--"Broken" me

It's really sad huh? I can only write these things when I'm in the mood. I don't know why I wrote a poem like this though. I guess I've always wanted to write a poem about a broken person. Thought it'd be interesting. Because we're all broken some where. Not completely I hope, but tainted, cracked, stained, and I need a fan ficcie before I go ballistic! ~rips out hair~ alrighty. Byeee.

out.

2003-10-19T19:15:00.000-07:00

Weather: Shitty
Mood: ..Shitty
Music:........Shitty

I hate this, I have no close friends. Nothing is like what it used to be. I used to have sooo much fun with my friends, but now it's like, they think I'm boring. But, of course, I tried talking to Mary about it and she says I'm just imagining things. No I'm not! Gawd! I think I know when I'm becoming the loser of the group! I just want to be happy again like I used to.

I think I'll distance myself from everyone for awhile. Maybe then they'll understand. And maybe then, when we get back together I won't be easy to read like they can do now. But...I'm not easy to read, am I?...I don't know, I just don't want to have to see them tomorrow. I wish I didn't have any classes with my friends, that way I wouldn't have to talk to them...

..owari~

2003-10-19T12:36:00.000-07:00

Weather: Sunny~! WOO!
Mood: Happy, not wanting to do her geometry.
Music: "Real Emotion" FF X-2 MIX ~dances~

~dances to the song~ Woo! I love this song. It kinda sucks that Yuna "sings" it in the game though, kinda ruins the whole thing. But it's still a cool song. La. Well, not much went on this weekend, we had our last marching band performance last weekend and it was really cool. We got third, and didn't win any special awards, but we were still awesome I guess. I think that we should have won best color guard though. 'The gang' and I finally got to see Lincoln perform, and gawd they kicked ass. It was the coolest thing ever in this entire world! They won every thing except the 'Best Drummajors' which they should have won anyway. So Leigh was bummed, lol. We had a blast though. I can't believe it's over though. I had to ASK people how to get to school and every thing @_@

Sue is sad, she wants a boy friend really bad, and I guess I can only say this because I've had one, but, they're not all they're cracked up to be. I mean, kissing romantically and hugging, and being able to have a blast with them is not how it goes AT ALL. Firt off, the guy is only nice to you when you're alone, when he's with his buddies he's not going to be all cute to you, second, it's really hard for teenagers to have a fun relationship, with all the emotions and things mixed in. I TRIED telling her, but I'm guessing Andrea is being too big of an influence on her and she's going off the deepend. Well, I just found her new blog, and changed the link. I'm thinking about learning HTML really well, and then offering to create a website for Mr. Smith so we can have a marching band web site too. Man, the things I could do! ^_^ Well, I'm off, trying to get ahold of Dane to apologize to him for being mean when he came with my shoe. T_T but otherwise, nothing else is really going on.

2003-10-14T15:24:00.000-07:00

Weaher: Don't know
Mood: Bored, Peaceful
Music: really pretty FFX-2 International-Last Mission music from the website...

Sheesh, it took me FOREVER to edit the colors on this page. And I didn't really do all that much. I learned a lot though. I'm really tired today, and I don't want to go to school tomorrow but at the same time I really want to go. I'm not sure what to do in this post, I don't feel like writing. But maybe I'll post a few website for you all to look at if you're bored! Here, I'll put them in all nice and pretty ^^

Never mind...

2003-10-13T18:25:00.000-07:00

Weahter: Kind of Cloudy, there was a really pretty sun set!
Mood: Exhausted
Music: None

Now I'm extremely tired. I'm gonna write what my theory about Advent Children (now AC to shorten it) because I have a few good ideas ~I do?~ heh. Well, one of the most important thingies to do in order to find out what something is about is to find out what the title means! I looked up the definition for Advent because you all obviously know what Children means O.o.

adÂ·vent
The coming or arrival, especially of something extremely important: the advent of the computer.
Advent
The liturgical period preceding Christmas, beginning in Western churches on the fourth Sunday before Christmas and in Eastern churches in mid-November, and observed by many Christians as a season of prayer, fasting, and penitence.
Christianity. The coming of Jesus at the Incarnation.
Christianity. See Second Coming.

So..from above you can obviously draw to a conclusion that it means the coming of something. But the coming of what exactly? Well, good old obsessed Lauren downloaded the trailer so I'll give you a good detail of what it is.

The first scene opens up in black with the glowing white words 'This is not for playing' I'm thinking this is just to set the mood, and/or to tell them it's not going to be a game. ~glares at the people walking in front of the camera while it's recording~ Then, it plays some happy joyous music and shows the life stream coming out to stop meteor. It's something really familiar if you've beaten the game.

Does this have anything to do with the word Advent in the title? Could this mean that Aeris is returning?

Then, it suddenly switches to a scene which is said to be two years after Cloudie defeates Sephy. You see him driving down a highway on a motor cycle (stop stealing Zackie-poo's talents >.<) with his sword held out. The scenery can be described as midgard, only you can see the sky. Just a lot of rusty pipes. Anyway, then it zooms ahead and you get a veiw of this guy with short silver hair in black leather who looks EXTREMELY like Sephiroth.

Well, if he isn't the nicest guy, because then he shoots out blue firework thingies at Cloud and they explode all around him. The motorcycle is tossed into the air and Cloud still manages to smack the guy! (well, the silver haired guy blocks him with his sword, but it's still cool) Then, there is a short scene of Cloud walking through Aeris' church (he looks sad U.U) Then it switches to a scene where Cloud and the silver haired guy are fighting...

He looks soooo hot....O.O ~shakes her head~ alrighty! After the simple fight scene, it switches to what I believe is the place where Zack is killed, only it looks really desolate (obviously because of Meteor) He slams the old, rusty buster sword into the ground and stands there.

Another guess is maybe he's going to try and uncover the rest of himself since it's obvious he still takes after Zack a lot. Maybe something happened in the past between him and Seph and Zack that was important to the story line.

Alright, the next scene is just plain weird. It's a dark room with a person dressed in a white robe covering their face is sitting in a wheelchair. The silver haired guy walks up to them and grabs their hand, kneels down and looks up. He then fades into a picture of Sephiroth after he burned down Nibelheim and shows him walking into the fire. Then it ends.

Well, my main theory because of the logo (it shows Seph on one side and Cloud on the other and they appear to both be fading into the blue back ground) is that something's either going on with Cloud where he and Sephiroth were some how connected, or Jenova is being brought into it. If you notice, Jenova cloudn't have died, since Cloud's cells survive on Jenova's cells, he would have died after they killed her. So my guess is that she is still alive some how. Zack and Aerith are definitely going to be brought into this. It might be possible that something happened that Zack knows. And who can forget Aerith's famous line "I'll come back when it's all over." which means that Cloud has to choose whether or not to have Aerith come back or not (he chooses Tifa or her). One last detail. The Promised Land is not an actual place. It is a state of being. Where some one is pretty much in ecstasy. That;s why in the end Cloud says something like "The Promised Land, I think I can meet her there" meaning, he can meet her in his heart (it's so sweet ^^)

Well, I hope you enjoyed this and you're excited about the new movie! I'll post up more details another time.

2003-10-13T17:41:00.000-07:00

Weather: Kinda cloudy O.o
Mood: Tired
Music: Hillary Duff @_@

SOOOOOOOOO tired, we went to the mall this morning and then I hung at Reshma's house for a long time. Now I'm sitting here, hungry. Ag. No stories tonight. I'm going to rant about how much I love Final Fantasy VII. I think it would be cool if some how Cloud was actually a girl and they made it into a love story between her and Sephy...it'd be sad...*siff* But I think I might write a ficcy like that. @.o I'm weird like that

~holds up sign~ FINAL FANTASY VII ADVENT CHIlDREN KICKS ASS!

I'll write later..

2003-10-12T15:50:00.000-07:00

Weather:...Something?
Mood: Tired
Music: Some kick azz European Dance Remix off the radio

Hey, sorry guys, but I'm screwing the story. It's going no where and I've got other things on my mind. I am thinking of starting another story though. I'll preveiw it below, but I seriously might not get started till later ~jams~ this sooo sucks, my arm warmers got untangled and I might not be able to wear them, I'll take some money out of my bank account tomorrow. Lessee...fourty, fifteen, ten...sixty five dollars...I'll only need about twenty or so. But you see, do I really need to waste my money on a thirty four dollar skirt that I'll never wear again? Maybe I can find a cheaper one, if not I'm getting it. ^_^ I wanna look hott for the dance XP

Alrighty, nothing else going on really. I'm bored as hell, just got done watching 2fast 2furious and it was a kick ass movie. Buttt...now there's nothing to do. Mary's out, Dane's out...no one to call...~dies~ well, I guess I can just write up the the preveiw...hang

The captain looked up from his work at the yougn man standing next to him. He was tall, and well built but only in his early twenties. The man was wearing what looked like some kind of armor or something. "What? How did you get in here?"

"I need to know what happened in America in the year two thousand and three." He stated monotoniously.

"Why?"

"Don't play stupid with me, I know you know." The officer looked into the man's eyes and realized that they were an abnormal green. Almost as if some one had inserted glowing lights into them. Backing up his rolling chair, he folded his arms in his lap.

"Who'd you hear that from?"

"It doesn't matter. Tell me everything you know."

"...There was an old church that was having mass on a regular sunday in a regular town. We don't know the cause. Apparently, there was a tear...I don't know what kind of a tear, some dimensional shit I couldn't explain to you even if I knew. All the people attending mass...matter-o-fact all the people in the whole fricken country vanished into thin air. That's not the worst though. We can't remember anything about those people, the church, the whole damn country! All we know is from rumors and pictures, and old maps. Apparently, the tear is still there. That's the cause of all the mutations in the animals, and why they're beginning to attack. They know what's going to happen. We're all gonna die."

"Why do you say that?" The mystery man asked, flashing a golden pistol at his side. The officer sighed and looked up.

"Cause we've seen her. She appeared all over television one day, screaming at us how she hated us. Then she'd switch to laughing and saying how she loved us. My guess is that she's some kind of angry spirit, or maybe even a god. Maybe she's unbalanced or something, so she's destroying the world. Sounds cheesy, but that's how it is."

"What did she look like?"

"I dunno...teenager or so. Everything was tinted bluish so I couldn't tell you what color her eyes were or anythin'."

"Why haven't I hear of this before? To think if she appeared all over t.v. some one would be bound to talk about it."

"Oh, I'm sure you haven't. People are too scared, especially since the animals began goin' crazy. Now, I suggest you get your head outta this business before you get hurt."

The young man sighed and left. Too many holes, too many damn holes in the story. What was going on in this world?

"I see you've been sneaking off again, Relic." He turned around to see a young woman glaring at him with dark blue eyes.

"Why won't you leave me alone? Before you wanted to get rid of me and ever since you saw those weird thingies on my arm you won't leave me alone." She walked up to him and looked him straight in the eyes.

"Lemme see them."

"..?"

"Your arm. Let me see your arm." He reluctantly held out his arm and she pulled back the sleeve. Relic's eyes widened as he now saw, that the strange boils were gone, now replaced with fine metallic inscriptions. They reminded him of a henna tatto that he'd seen in India. "Now that's what I thought. You're mutating like the animals. Your carbon based molecules in your arm have mutated into a metal based compound thus creating what you see here."

"Metal?"

WOOOOOOOOO! ^^ I had to stop myself before I wrote too much. I know you're all making assumtions right now BUT YOU'RE WRONG!! MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ~dances~ well, DDR is calling me so I'll see you laterz!

2003-10-11T20:06:00.000-07:00

Weather: Was crappy, now I don't really care
Mood: ~wants to go to Hot Topic RIGHT NOW~
Music: Nothing right now...too lazy to get my CD

Alrighty, sorry I haven't updated lately, I'm banned from the computer again ~_~ but, at least I'm on now! I've had a lot of time to think and I'm naming my story "My Side" and changing a few things. I'm making Rein and Logan kind of opposites...you'll see what I mean. It's kind of a side story, meaning it's not taking off from when I left of, but it's still in the story...so yeah...O.o *PUNK GOTH SCHOOL GIRLS ROCK!

Rein woke up once again to the early morning sunlight blinding her still sleep-filled eyes. She turned away from the light and faced some one she wasn't expecting. Logan was laying next to her, fast asleep, He looks so cute! she thought to herself. Rein pulled out a hand from underneath the quilt they used as a comforter and pet his cheek. His eyes opened and he smiled, then pulled her into a warm hug.

"...morning..." he said sleepily.

"Morning." she smiled, then slipped out of bed. Stretching in one of his collared button-downs that was waaaaay too big for her, she went to the kitchen to make breakfast.

~*~

After they'd eaten and dressed, they headed out to the barn. Rein had gotten into the habbit of helping Logan for early morning chores, that way he got done faster and they could hang out longer. To think, she'd gone from a suicidal loser to a lover of a once popular guy. She laughed.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing, just thinking of all the irony I've gotten mysefl into." She smiled and leaned against an old wooden fence.

"What does that mean?" He followed her example.

"I mean, I used to be a total loser..." he looked at her questioningly. She sighed. "I used to be a punk if you didn't know." He laughed.

"No way, you look more like a preppy to me." He wrapped his arm around her. "A naturally beautiful one that is."

"You're seducing me aren't you?"

"So what if I am...?" With that he pulled her into a kiss and he could feel her melt within his grasp. He pulled away and laughed when he saw her blushing furiously. "Now that's something you don't even do inside..."

"It's usually to dark when we're inside...sheesh." She noticed his hand had traveled to her butt and she gave it a playful shake.

Yeah, life's great here. There must really be a God out there somewhere. And if he's listening now, tell him that the man I'm in love with is just like what I dreamed. And sorry about the premarital sex thing, but I think it's way over rated.

WOO!! ~dances the jig~ well? likey? hope so! ~loves her arm warmers~ weeeell, I like the butt shaking part, wouldn't that be soooo cute!!! I need to add a scene where he wakes up and scratched his tummy, I think that's the cutest thing a guy can do!

~out

2003-10-06T19:22:00.000-07:00

Weather: Perdy
Mood: Bored, sick ~_~
Music: dunno what the name is...

^^ I hope you love-ed my story ^^ I know youuu did! ^_________^ I like it too, it's a little messed up in some parts, but a lot of them are funny and I think I was half sane when I wrote this... @_@ N E WAY, bored...^_^ coolie song on now...~five hours later~ Alrighty I'm finally writing!!

Rein woke up the next morning to see the sun had just begun rising. From what she guessed, it was around five in the morning. She made an attempt to cover her eyes from the light with a tired hand and noticed that she wasn't alone in the room. Leaning against the wall was a tall, dark man she recognized as Logan. He was looking down at her and smiling slightly, his dark brown eyes were gleaming in the dim sunlight. She smiled back, he looked different in the morning. Almost, neat. He stood there shirtless, the contours of his muscles outlined so smoothly that a memory of last night rushed into her mind. He...and I.... The thought was so foreign to her that it was hard to imagine she was capable of attaining such a...privileged? She laughed to herself and realized that she was naked underneath the covers...which unfortunately brought more memories back. It wasn't that she didn't like thinking about it, she just wanted to save it for later. For now, she searched the sides of the bed for some sort of clothing to wear and found that her clothes had been tossed across the floor. Grabbing the sheets around her, she walked to the corner and picked up her undergarments and his baggy button down white with light blue pinstriped shirt and slipped them on.

Logan walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her neck. She smiled and turned around to face him, then pecked him lightly on the cheek. He returned with another soft butterfly kiss and lead her out to the kitchen. "I made some eggs if you're hungry..." he said sleepily. "I need to go out and do chores so I'll be back in a half an hour or so, then I have a little surprize for you."

She got dressed in a pair of old jeans and a sweart shirt (both were way too big for her) and waited outside in the morning air for him to return from the barn. Logan finally returned, leading two horses with them. "Rein, meet Dusty and Midnight." He gestured to the large morgan horse, and then to the black mare. Both were saddled and ready and he helped her up. "Have you ever ridden before?"

"A little, my grandpa used to own a farm..." she said quietly, petting the black horse's mane. He smiled and mounted the morgan horse.

"It's really simple, all you need to do is let the horse know that you're the boss and then go from there." She nodded and gave it a try, and before long she'd gotten used to the main idea of it and they headed out on the trails.

The winding gravel trail lead through a beautiful forest where the leaves reflected the sun just right in the morning. Out in the distance she could see a feild of white and yellow daisies that they were heading towards. She leaned foreward and whispered 'Giddyup'. Instantly the horse took off like a bullet and she found herself laughing at the astonished Logan now disappearing from sight behind her. She reached the feild and saw that the ground was made of very soft soil. Unfortunately, so did the horse and she had to leap off before it crushed her as Midnight took a dust bath. Now it was Logan's turn to laugh as he caught up with her, watching her stand there, panting and shaking from the near-death experience.

"Hey! It's not funny! I could have been killed." She whined to him.

"Well, you didn't." He said, still snickering God his laugh made her insides melt. Logan attatched Midnight's dusty rein to the back of his horse's saddle and Rein sat behind Logan, sliding her arms around his waist.

"Some thing tell me, some one had this planned out this morning." She whispered in his ear as they headed back to the farmhouse.

2003-10-05T18:56:00.000-07:00

Weather: Gawd!!! ~is covered in aphids and chinese beetles~
Mood: A good depressed X_x
Music: Abandonned Pools "The Remedy"

Is it me, or is this the coolest song ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!~jumps up and down~ Well, I think I'm going to post a section of my story in here, it's rated R for language and....a breif statement of a lemon...if you do not know what this is, you are ignorant in the world of fan ficcies and must be condemed to hell! ~condems them~ "Most people call me...Tim" ahem...anyway, it's really depressing and sad at some parts and warm and sweet in others. So pleasy read!~

Rein looked up at Logan, his eyes were brightly shining in the dim light, even though they were the darkest shade of brown she'd ever seen. She found herself lost in a phantism of them, lost in their dark depths and what ever they hid. Who was this man? She'd known him for a few days now, and he thought he had the right to save her from suicide? Rein felt the urge to slap him, but kept her arm firmly at her side. What was she doing at this farm in...where ever she was? Her eyes examined his faced more closely. It was framed with dark brown hair that was a bit ruffled, and his features were cold, but they looked like they used to be playful and upbeat.

Logan looked down at the girl next to him. Her green eyes gazing up at him. He brushed a hand against her dark brown hair that extended down to her mid back with out thinking, and she pulled away, surprized. "Sorry..."was all he could say." He loved her hair for some reason...it was wavy and gave her a cold look, but it wasn't hard to see that at one time she had been carefree. Wait a second? What was he saying? He was examining her? Was he falling in love again? God save him from the depths of hell. He'd given up on girls a long time ago... But he couldn't help himself, and he examinded lower parts of her body. She immediatly notice and tried to distract him.

"So..where did you come from? Have you always lived here?" Her question was simple, but it's answer would be so complex and full of memories he didn't want to remember.

"I'm twenty, after high school I moved out here and I make money by moving heavy equipment and other small things." He shruged simply, yeah, that's what his life was, simple, just the way he wanted it. However, she didn't seem satisfied. But before she could get another question out, he cut her off. "It's getting dark out, here, I have an idea." He ran into the house and pulled out a lantern, lit the wick, and ran back outside with a few blankets in hand.

"What--?" Rein asked, but he nodded his head toward the barn. She followed, utterly confused. When they reached the barn, he set the blankets down and grabbed a ladder. Setting it against the barn so that they could climb to the roof, he told her to climb up to the top. "I thought you said you weren't a rapist or a murderer..." She said nonchalontly, while still climbing the ladder. He rolled his eyes and stuck the handle of the lantern in his mouth, then started up after her. He had a perfect veiw of her butt, which he avoided looking at until they got to the top. Then he went back down and brought the blankets up. Slowly, they climbed to the top.

Rein had no idea what he was planning, maybe he would throw her off the roof and she would break her neck...That wasn't the way she wanted to go. But, she followed him as he lead her up the roof. When they reached the top, she almost choked when she surpressed a gasp. There was what appeared to be a platform on the roof where you could lay with a perfect veiw of the sky. She took the blanket he handed her and sat down on the smooth oak boards. Logan set the lantern in the center and wrapped the second blanket around himself. "Do you like it?" he asked.

"Yeah..." she said, mentally smacking herself from being unable to surpress the awe and wonderment in her voice. He noticed and gave a small, sexy laugh. 'Sexy? Oh my God. What the hell is wrong with me? Then, she remembered the question he hadn't given her a chance to ask, and kneeled closer to him so she could see his face clearly in the lantern light. "Were there cute girls at your school?"

"Figured you'd ask that...You're how old?"

"Seventeen."

"Well, I was popular when I was in high school, which meant I had a lot of girl friends." He glanced at her.

"You're not a virgin are you Mr. Logan?" Rein made her voice sound like a school teacher's. "Do you not listen to all of those sex talks?"

"I should have."

"How many times?"

"What?! Why do you want to know?" She didn't reply, just stared up at him seriously. "I don't know...a lot."

"How much is a lot?" She sounded like a little kid.

"I don't know! Five?" He was getting seriously annoyed. What did she want from him? What did HE want from HER? This was so utterly confusing.

"Well, I'd always hoped that my first boy friend would be experienced." What. The. Hell. Did. That. Mean? He was seriously remembering some of his old girl friends being like this. But, why not? He loved her, even though he hated to admit it, he did. It wasn't hard to get the impression that she liked him too. They were both in a huge denial, so why not break the ice? He leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the lips. She stared at him as he leaned back, but he couldn't tell what she was thinking. It wasn't until she managed to lean foreward and kiss him back that he knew exactly what she was thinking.

Time stood still while they kissed. She was a horrible kisser, she'd obviously never been kissed, but it wasn't like that was a bad thing. It meant more control for him. Wait! Ag! What am I thinking? I sound like a high schooler again! He slipped his toungue inside her mouth and she moaned with delight, wrapping her arms tighter around his neck. He sloqly explored her mouth, and she just sat there taking it all in. Then, she became brave enough to explore herself, which she did in an unexperienced way. He helped her a little and then pulled away. The lantern had burned out, and so he could only see the outline of her in the darkness. "Do you...want to go inside?" She nodded and they returned to the house, only, she didn't sleep on the couch that night.

~oawri~

EEk! That rocked!! X_X mwuahahahahahaha. I didn't exactly describe that much see? But I'm too embaressed to describe something like that! ~_~ wait...I'm editing it now, I need to type that (sorry for the guys who have to read this!!!!) don't ask where I learned to write stuff like that either pleasy...it's not cool.

Dere we go! ^^ mwuahahahaha! read-ness!

out.

2003-10-04T20:22:00.000-07:00

Weather: Buggey
Mood: Sad, feeling alone
Music: none

Hey there. ~sits down sleepily and doesn't know what to say~...*sighs* Well, today was busy and everything was really fun. Mary got back last night safe and sound...but...*looks around* never mind...I can't say it because the other side of me won't tell me why I'm mad like this. Why can't I just know what I want? I hate it...God have pity on my poor soul...

Apparently Carolyn and Sue have been talking on the internet...cool I guess. She doesn't know my e-mail I don't think...~sighs again~ I was thinking about going to Lincoln to hang out with Leigh since things would be so much better there. I mean, every one at O Gorman would be rid of a girl they don't care about. Or at least they don't make the effort to show it. I'm constantly screaming on the inside to tell everyone how I'm so left out and how no one really cares about whether I'm there or not. I'm sick of it. I want to tell everyone the truth...

Another thing, I don't have any close friends anymore...they're all hanging out with some one else and I'm left alone. And the worst part is...they don't care. Gawd, why does my life seem to get worse and worse? It's like there's this big hole that I keep falling deeper and deeper into. Nothing will ever imporove I guess...~stands up~ Well, I'm going now, so I'll see you later some time............................

........out.............

2003-10-03T22:00:00.000-07:00

Weather: Dark
Mood: Dark in humor and sadness
Music: "You and I Both" Jason Mraz

A way to descrivbe my soul...

A deep hole taking up space in this vast world full of dreams
The hole keeps getting bigger, consuming other, beautiful sould
then, spitting them back out again.
It smells of greif, sadness, lonelyness, and a little bit of insanity.
In the end, it will absorb itself and vanish with out anyone knowing...

~lays down and looks up at her hand~ I wonder why I do this to myself. I'm digging a deeper, and deeper grave and I'm not stopping myself. Mary's out walking some where sad because I hurt her feelings...and I don't know what to think. G'night...

out.

2003-10-01T18:46:00.000-07:00

Weather: Dark outside...
Mood: Neutral
Music: "Just Let Me Cry" Ashlee Simpson

'I, I don't know why
Why you need some reason
to feel loved in side
you you know that i'm alright
you know that i'm just the kind of girl
who feels hurt and smiles' --Ashlee Simpson "Just Let Me Cry"

~huggles the song~ I wub this song!!! ^^ Blah...today was so shitty I have no idea where to start. I sent around the note and Lacey really pissed me off by saying that she didn't care for holidays so she didn't want to come. Gawd she knows how to make me mad. Everyone else seems happy though. I can't wait for it.

Then, I finally found out my grade on the Biology test. I got a fuckin' SIXTY NINE PERCENT! Gawd you have no idea how horrible it was! One, my dad would kill me, two, I had failed myself. I almost started crying!!!! T_T It was awful! So the rest of the day I was really quiet trying to think of something...but I couldn't think of anything. I kept thinking about the test and how my dad would react. Turns out, he was mad but not too mad. And I got good grades on my midterm so I'm doin' fine! XD Well, I'm getting tired just typing so bye bye.

out.

2003-09-30T16:20:00.000-07:00

Weather: Ah...~looks outside~ clear skies I think....O.o
Mood: Seriously Pissed off at my dad
Music: "I Saw A Bird Fly Away" Dar Williams

GAWD! MY DAD IS SOOOO MEAN! He's limiting my computer time to two hours and he's happy about it pretty much. I see this glint in his eyes that pretty much gives it away. I'm not being a stubborn teen ager. I swear to God that he enjoys yelling at me. I'm his stress releaser...thingy...GAWD! ~eats chibi dolls of her dad~

In case any one was wondering...my day WAS alright until dad picked me up. I said I didn't want to have chinese since we eat there a lot, so he just gets all mad at me and drives home...there are like five fast food resturants from his weight place to home and he didn't care. Gawd! He's SUPPOSED to be on a diet....~cusses~ he just told me to go to my room. This blow...seriously...Well, otherwise...my day was alright. We had sex ed this morning and the speaker was soo cool. It was kinda scary when she talked about some stuff O.o Anyway, I better get off soon because dad is 'taking time away from my two hours' on the computer....~eats more chibi dolls of him~

out....

2003-09-29T17:37:00.000-07:00

Weather: Seriosly don't care
Mood: Pissed off, depressed, happy^^
Music: ~quickly switches on WMP~ "She Is Beautiful" FF Soundtrack

I haven't been on forever, and I can't be on for long b/c I have to finish math and write some science notes from Nick's notebook. Other than that nothing much has been going on lately. I've been having a bad month. Pretty much ever since school started. I'm really boring now I think. Because no one really seems to care if I'm around or not. I mean, they totally forgot about me at the movie theatre...and I've only had one sleep over with a single person for months! (and it was only because their mom suggested it)...so I'm lost really...I'm not sure what to do. I thought about letting it go because that's what Mary is saying, and yet she doesn't have to worry about loosing friends and stuff like me (at least not now anyway). So I'm lost for now.

On the other hand I have a neato angsty fanficcie idea for Cloudie-sama! ^^ I'm thinking about sticking his dad and mom in there as one of the main conflicts and adding an OC, well...his dad is kinda one too...O.o cornfuzzling! Cause...he has/had a dad (rhymes! ^^) but it never shows him or anything...coolie!! ^^ XDXDXD

Well, I'm losing it...i finally got the Citrus Breeze toothpaste I ordered two months ago!!!! ~dies~ it's sooo cool though! It's orange! XDXDXDXDXD I'm thinking about getting the mint one though, it smells good. ~huffs toothpaste~ I better tell Reshma about this!!!!! ^__________________________^

outie.

2003-09-22T16:46:00.000-07:00

Weather: Really pretty sunset
Mood: Calm
Music: "The Ultimate" Linsey Lohan

I love this song! ^0^ It rox, no question 'bout it. ~glares at Kev while he reads her journal~ lol, guess it's backfiring on me when I put my personal thoughts on the internet. I don't really care though. It's my way of telling people my problems, only not face to face. It's easier that way for me. And people can't ger mad at me or anything ^^ well, they can, but I won't know about it until the next day! lol, I am a blonde.

Lesse...not much went on today. It was decade today, and it was lots of fun. I was really uncomfortable in my clothes today tho, they were just too tight I guess. And they weren't even that tight O.o....I missed the opportunity to wear my beanie this morning and it made me mad. Then Krissie started crying because Mr. Smith chewed her out in front of the entire band. U.U I know how she feels. She was really sad all that day, but she got better, she's still pissed at him. She really does have a reason to be mad at him tho. Lacey gave us a funny speech and it turns out my mom didn't know I had flag practice until five, so she didn't tell my dad and he sat in the car for a half an hour!! I felt so bad...but then he chewed me out and I didn't feel so sorry for him ^0^.....

Bored...Dane's at Arlo's so I can't annoy the crap outta him tonight. Mary was sick again today, she seems really sick...she better get well soon other wise she'll lose all of her sick days. XD

I've been writing really long entries these days. I wonder why...I have to search for some stuff for my introduction for Oral Interp and read through chapter three in bio and study, we have our big exam tomorrow ~dies~

out.

2003-09-21T13:12:00.000-07:00

Weather: Pretty blue sky and perfectly white clouds
Mood: Peaceful, slightly sad
Music: "On Love, In Sadness" Jason Mraz

I like this song ^^ it's really neat. As you guessed, I got new CDs today, I got Jason Mras's 'Waiting for My Rocket to Come' which I think is a cute name. I also got the 'Freaky Friday Soundtrack' which I wasn't expecting to get until the movie came out on video, so it's an extra bonus I guess ~shrugs~ I slept over at Reshma's we didn't do much though, we hung out on her trampoline and talked a lot, other than that nothing. We watched 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail' and then went to the movie theatre with Sue and Carolyn to see 'Freaky Friday'. I felt really bad because they knew we were having a sleepover and there wasn't much I could say.
I'm still debating whether or not to become friends with Carolyn or not. I mean, she's done a lot to hurt me and she hasn't apologized for what she said about me. So she really doesn't deserve to become my friend. It's not like I hate her or anything. I'm perfectly fine with her, there's nothing wrong (besides the Pat thing) and I'm fine with hanging out with her and everyone else. I just don't feel that I could go any further than that. 'Course, Mary thinks that we're friends and everything is all fine and dandy. But to think, if she had her 'Warrior Woman' abilities that she says she has (weird name I gave them huh? ^^) she would've noticed Caro's always trying to compete with me. ~smirks~ I guess I was right...
I've been meaning to get something done lately, like a story or something, but I'm not in the inspirational mood really. So I'll be off of the stories for awhile. Dane should be back by now, I hope he'll be alright, I'm sure he's fine..although, Colorado would be a smack of reality for him if you know what I mean. I feel really bad that he has to do this alone, but there really isn't a way to help him without hurting him even more. ~rubs her eyes~
This is a long, dissyish entry and Mary'll probably get POed at me, but this is my journal and I have the right to speak my mind. If she takes it all offensively (or anyone else for that matter) she should just stop reading my journal. I also wrote a letter asking why I never get any e-mails anymore, and she chewed me out saying that I was paranoid and that I should be happy Caro and I are becoming friends...where ever the hell she got that idea, I have no clue. She doesn't even see us hang out! @_@ welp, I'm running out of things to say...
One last thing, I was hanging out with Sue and she seemed to get along with me, so I think I'll invite her over sometime this weekend. It'll be fun after homecoming and all...speaking of which I need an outfit for tomorrow...

Out.

2003-09-19T20:15:00.000-07:00

Weather: pretty blue skies
Mood: depressed yet happy
Music: none

Well, I rebooted my computer, and it's so fast now! I can surf the net with all these things annoying me, it's soooo awesome! I had a really bad day other than that. The fact is, I feel like I'm losing all my friends. I haven't had a sleep over/hung out with anyone since the beginning of school (besides Mary's sleepover) and I'm seriously worried. I try to say 'hi' to people in the hallways and everything, but it doesn't seem to help. Also, at mass this week, I was going to sit next to Sue, but she was saving it for Andrea. I almost cried! (such a cry baby! XP) But Sue is moving on, and so should I. I can't let go though, and I shouldn't have to...so what if we don't have any classes together! It doesn't mean that we can't be best friends anymore...does it? She didn't really seem to care when I talked about it with her, but I don't know...Mary was sick all this week which was kind of weird...and I fell off of my brother's scooter right in front of my neighbor and his friends and they all started calling me "clutz" and stuff. It sucked like hell.

Well, I'm running out of things to say, and I need to upload some CDs onto Windows Media player, so I'll go.

2003-09-14T15:56:00.000-07:00

Weather: Dunno...O.o
Mood: Paranoid
Feeling: strange...
Music: "Eyes On Me" Faye Wong

'Whenever sang my songs
on the stage,
on my own...

Never said my words,
Wishing they would be heard.' --Faye Wong

Today was...interesting. I'm paranoid again since we watched 'The Cell' last night at Mary's and I couldn't get to sleep. But I feel fine. I took a nap today and then recovered mostly. I'm going to bed early tonight. Kevin just signed in, but I don't feel like talking to him. I wish I could make some online friends. But I refuse to hang out in a chat room mainly because of the increasing numbers of hackers in them now. If I were a hacker myself then that'd be another story, but for now I'll just stay safe.

I've decided to being cleaning up this computer. I've even considered rebooting it because it's so slow, but it's not that slow and it still works fine, so I'll live. Plus we would lose Word if I did, so I'm fine for now ~huggles her stories~

This thought just occured to me, I think I'm going to completely start over with my story and start anew. Never mind, I couldn't leave Soul-chan, he's too cute ^^ There's not much else to say, so sionara~!

out.

2003-09-04T16:36:00.000-07:00

Weather: Beautiful, clear skies ^^
Mood: Refreshed, relieved, happy
Feeling: Full of milk and happiness
Music: "The Hell Song" Sum 41

'Part of me,
Won't agree
'cause I don't know if it's for sure

Suddenly, Suddenly
I don't feel so insecure
Anymore' --Sum 41

LOL! I almost put Sum 42...I wonder what their name means? I used to think that they were this big heavy metal band, but I love this song! ^-^ As you've noticed, I'm A LOT better now. I just let myself go today and didn't let anything get to me and I had a GREAT day. I'm going to the Oral Interp meeting tonight and I've had a busy day. You know, I had the usual, get up early for band and then school then after that I had flag practice and then piano and now the meeting. Piano was GREAT Julie laughed so much, she knows how to put me in a GREAT mood. Flags was alright, I didn't really care, we got our pants ^^ and our shoes, both very cool. We got our Freshmen shirts too, they're really cute.

Hmmm what else happened today? Oh yeah! I got this great restart on my story and I'm taking my language teacher's advice for writing (o.O) I started with just thinking up ideas, and then I made a graphic organizer (you wouldn't believe how HUGE it is) it's starting off so well!

I have to go to the meeting now, cya tomorrow?

out.

2003-09-03T19:20:00.000-07:00

Weather: Don't care, dark?
Mood: Sad
Feeling: Hungry, empty
Music: "The Math" Hillary Duff

'If you can't do the math,
then get out of the equation
I am calling you back
this is *69.' --Hillary Duff

As you've noticed I'm only listening to Hillary Duff now. I'm in denial that I need more music, but everytime I get a chance to buy more music I forget to bring my money/gift cards. XP Anyway, I'm seriously bored after talking to Dane on the phone for an hour or so. I feel like I didn't eat supper..oh yeah, that's right we had lasangnia and I almost barfed...plus Ryan made that bananna/peanut butter/ powdered sugar crap...eew...
Well, I'm sad because I currently hate my life. I never treat anyone right, and I know a little part of me likes it...whatever that part of me is. Probably that Lauren. Dane's wondering why I'm not hyper and I'm not telling him. When he reads this he can find out. I seriously hate my life, and it's not getting better. I have a crap load of reasons, but I won't list them because it'll get around and soon everyone will be gathering around me being like "What's wrong Lauren?" which a part of me likes the attention too...~mutters~ oh well, this will pass in time and I'll grow up and die. It doesn't really matter anyway. I don't know why I care so much about myself. I wish I was more like Mary, she doesn't fight with anyone (but me) anymore. Every one has grown up exccept me, I still pick on people and get into fights with them. I'll probably lose all my friends and graduate as the class reject, then grow up to work at Mc Donalds all my life...this blows.
Why can't I just have a happy life? I need to get away from everything. But at the same time, when I know that Dane is far away I feel scared. It's not saying I like him, but when I hang out with him I don't have to think/worry about those things. Like a really neat older but smaller brother. ~smacks face on desk~ now this rumor that I like him will probably get around too. Oh well, like I said, doesn't matter.

out.

2003-09-01T11:12:00.000-07:00

Weather: Blue Skys, Nice little breeze Mood: Confused, Happy, Slightly sad Feeling: Full/Deprived of DDR Music: "Anywhere But Here" Hillary Duff

'I'm falling through the door
flying across the floor
and when you look at me,
suddenly it's clear.' --Hillary Duff

I love this new CD Mary gave me for my birthday, it has really bouncy, positive lyrics and beats. ~dances~ About my mood thingy ~points above~ I'm feeling a mix of emotions on a lot of topics. It's really hard on my psyche too. >.< But I think it's eventually clearing up. A lot of it has to do with Carolyn, Sue, and Mary...I need to go run around after this!

Alright, first there is Confused...

I'm having problems with Carolyn a lot. I don't mind her at all, she's happy and everything...it's just...I sound really selfish when I say this but...she steals Mary and Sue away from me whenever she's around. I try to talk to them, and I get them interested for a little, but then Carolyn shows up and they have fun hanging out with her. Am I boring or something? I didn't think I was, but maybe I am. ~sighs~ There really isn't much I can do about it. I guess I just need to go along with it, but I think Sue is leaving me...I can't tell for sure, but she seems distant. Or maybe it's me...Mary's always been best friends with Carolyn, so naturally she hangs out with her more. I don't know what to think.

Then There is Happy

Yes, it was my birthday on Firday, and then I had my oarty Saturday. It was a lot of fun, but I don't know if every one had fun...I hope so anyway. We only got four hours of sleep since we watched Jeepers Creepers and Sixth Sense. Jeepers Creepers was.....blah...eew....yuck...but I guess it was really cheesy too. Sixth Sense is just so much fun to watch. I love Haley Jo Osmond ^^ Krystal got me this awesome lamp, it's so neato!

Slightly sad mixes in with Confused so I don't have to explain that one.

out.

2003-08-19T09:15:00.000-07:00

Weather: Awesome, it's couldy and raining a little
Mood: Confused, unexplainable
Feeling: Full...just ate cereal
Music: "Rock Your Body" Justin Timberlake

'Talk to me boy,'
'I can't wait to have you in my arms,'
'Talk to me boy,'
'Hurry up 'cause you're takin' too long,'
'Talk to me boy,'
'Gonna have you naked by the end of this song,' --Justin imberlake and his girly backup singer

Hiya! I haven't written in such a long time. I haven't been all that busy either XD so no excuses for mee! Well, yesterday I happened upon this FREE online game called Pristontale, it looked soooo cool...but the game takes up a whole gigabyte, I think I'll download it anyway to see if it's fun, it takes at least two hours to download which is actually really fast.
What else...oh yeah, I talked on the phone with Mary for like two hours. I feel really bad because she seemed tired. But I realized a lot of stuff. And the whole Infinity thing is off, it was just like Panaru and her friend you know? o.o Glad I didn't end up like them...anyway, I'm copying CDs onto Real Player right now, it's fun. I love the song 'Feel' by Robbie Williams, and 'The Hell Song' by Sum 41 they're really cool. ~gets up and dances~
Now I'm listening to my Hotel Paper CD, I love this CD!!

out.

2003-08-01T17:35:00.000-07:00

Weather: Beautifu, puffy clouds
Mood: Neutral
Feeling: Nautious ~head lolls to side~
Music: 'Leave you far behind' Lunatic Calm

'I want, I want, I want, I want to leave you far behind.' --Lunatic Calm

I love this song, it really pumps you up and it's true...there are some people I would like to leave far behind. But I can't exactly do that in a world like this :)...I saw Alex and Emma yesterday, it was so good...but I went to it thinking it was a totally different movie XD. Dane just got back from camp yesterday when Mary asked if I would ask him if he could come (Mary-->#^.^#), I felt really bad because he was so tired, but he had a lot of fun and was glad he came. We had to give him a ride tho XP...Hmmm...lemme think, today I woke up wondering why no one answered the phone and found out I was home alone. Gawd it feels like Saturday. I made this huge mistake on wednesday when I thought that it was actually thursday. But this morning I played FFX all day pretty much, I'm still not that far. I don't think it's possible to win the first blitzball game...Anyway, I'm really tired right now, and I have to manage a few more things so see ya!

Out.

2003-07-27T17:40:00.000-07:00

Weather: Humid, Cloudy, Crappy
Mood: Tired, Depressed
Music: 'Fighter'--Christina Aguilera

Hiya, I'm pretty tired and a little depressed. I had to babysit Laura and Sara today, they're so cute but I got really worn out. We had fun and everything, but they played with Paige and Ryan most of the time. I just got back from the lake with Sue at noon. I'm so tired from that too. Although, I did get to a really good part in my story! It's when Relic tells who the DarkSpawn is...that name is retarded isn't it? I need a new one..but I want it to be cool. Like, you know instantly just from hearing it that it's a bad thing, but I don't want it to be 'fujikakakakalalafjwekjgiohy!' or some long japanese name. So, anyway Reshma got back today..and I should be happy, but I feel so distant from her. Like, she shouldn't trust me anymore. Some times I kinda wish I could just watch from the sidelines. Like, a ghost who goes where ever her friends are, but they can't see her. That way, I could have fun AND I wouldn't hurt anyone anymore. I hope Mary reads this, that way she'll know she was right all along. I don't know why Sue agrees with me when I said that I was fine. I'll never change and I'll probably never accomplish anything. This is so stupid and I hate it. But I'm gonna change. I haven't yet, but I will.

2003-07-24T16:25:00.000-07:00

Hey, another post. I feel kind of bad because Dane wasn't online last night like he usually is...so I called him to ask where he was and he told me he washaving a sleepover with Arlo. So, stupid me, I wasted a lot of his time by talking when he was supposed to be having fun with Arlo. Then I had to call him again to get him to go online to read Lacey's e-mail, and I said a lot of inapropriate stuff. It really sucks. Well, I got a new journal today after going to the mall with Lacey, I don't think she had much fun. But I tried at least...:S...oh well, I don't think she's mad at me or anything. I tried asking her about Arlo, but she refused to tell me anything ^^ it was kinda funny. Just got back from piano and now I'm bored as hell...phone just rang, hope it's for me...NO ONE'S ANSWERING!! grr.........................................................

Out.

2003-07-23T16:11:00.000-07:00

Hi! It's me, *Ruby*Red* the other blog was screwed up for some reason, and it wouldn't update or put up any HTML I made. So I made this one! Update your links! Speaking of links, I have to add Kuro, Jade, and Nakisen's blogs to my links, and I think I'll put my tagboard back up. What else...new e-mail at stainedhotelpaper@hotmail.com and I'm trying to help Sue make a web site >.<...I showed her how to edit HTML on her blog and now she's trying to make one...too bad I don't know more otherwise this blog would have a really cool layout...something with Lain or Cloud...that'd rock.

Not much happened today, I had to get up at 8:00AM so I could let the people who were bring the cabinets for the basement in. I'm almost done with Relic's profile which is only the second one XD.....But I'll get it done. Dad and I went to go see Leage of Extraordinary Men, it was pretty good...stupid how the one guy dies...and the hot guy is bad...he dies too...I liked Mr. Jackle though, he was kinda cute...like little kid cute. I felt sorry for him ok? ^^() ~is backed into a corner by people who thinks she's weird~...Talking with Lacey right now, we might go shopping tomorrow ^^ Right now she's spazzing about her dog biting her XP...

So, I guess that a lot did happen today !! I got a new sketch book, it's literally a BOOK it's so cool. I spent a little time drawing my first picture. It turned out pretty well but I'll go back later and fnish it off.

Out